it hits again and again how we are all trying to figure our own selves out.
how we all have shadows and complicated stories and habits and how we all are trying to get to the root of them.
how we are all trying to figure out how we got here and where we are going next.
and how we sometimes, during this process, hit up against other people.
people we'll love, people we'll hate, people we'll not remember in the morning.
and sometimes we'll hurt these people.
and sometimes these people will hurt us.
and sometimes these people will save us.
and sometimes we'll be saving ourselves.
and it hits me how it won't necessarily make sense, it doesn't, why certain paths will cross and get intertwined and blossom and others will get tighter and tighter until they are both at risk of dying off, losing themselves.
and it hits me that even after that, you'll still be trying to figure yourself out.
and, really, that is all we can do. do that work on ourselves. foster our personal growth. fully learn to love and take care of ourselves. and let go of everything else.
sometimes i feel like a snake, shedding yet another skin, another layer. each time i am afraid i'll be bare and exposed. each time i am scared there isn't another layer left...but there is.
and that layer is somehow more me than the last. more comfortable, more vibrant.
and, like the snake, i just let the old layer stay where it is. let it blow in the wind. let it be a memory. a remnant.
it hits me how we are all shedding skins and we can't knock each other for that. all we can do is let each other shed. give each other room and space and time. let each other get comfortable in our new skin.
and let that old skin, that old self, that old friend, go.