i have a hard time living in the moment.
(this is why meditation and yoga are good things for me.)
i sometimes feel like i am constantly battling the past and fearing the future and missing the present in the process.
because of this, i sometimes try to note the moments i actually feel in the moment.
sometimes when i am writing it happens. sometimes during a run. sometimes when reading. sometimes when i am standing and looking at the water or looking at down at the world from an overlook i've hiked to. sometimes when i listen to a song.
it happens from time to time.
but it hit me this morning that the most consistent one lately...the one i get nearly every day...happens every morning.
when the sunlight is beginning to pour into the bedroom, right after my boyfriend's alarm has gone off, when everything slows. for a moment, it is me and the boyfriend and the dog. and we come together in a pile of hugs and belly rubs and sometimes words and sometimes not. it can last a minute. it can last ten minutes. and then the day has to start. showers need to be had. coffee has to be made. the pup is ready for food.
and to be honest, at some point, i slip back into my bad habit of not being able to stay in the moment. worries and anxieties and lord knows what else begin to slip back in...
but there are a few moments there....a few moments when nothing before or after matters. just then, just the pile of us, just the light coming through the window.